Today, a friend of mine gets the honor of being Lafango's 'Stage of the day'. Innomen has had his blog for quite some time now, and regularly writes about topics that, maybe, you or I might not be bold enough to put what we really think for the world to see. Even if he thinks no one else agrees with him, he is not slowed down or filtered by anyone.
I have been friends with innomen since my teenage years, and have got the pleasure of getting his big personality in full force (*cough* whether I liked it or not). To just read his blog, you get a sense of his intelligence and sheer will, and its easy to imagine that he might not be easy to hang out with if your beliefs differ from his. This is not the case. Innomen is a delight to hang out with. He is polite, soft spoken, and willing to listen to just about anything you have to say, just make sure you can handle his side of it. To me, he is a very interesting person, with big ideas, and although I might not agree with them all, I love to hear them.
I am very happy that today he gets featured on Lafango. I will be there to show my support, and if you like big debates, smart people, and even bigger personalities(and ladies, he's single and not too bad on the eyes!) then go over to lafango and have a look!
Here is the link to the stage of the day: http://lafango.com/innomen?utm_source=lafango&utm_medium=banner&utm_content=innomen&utm_campaign=sotd#!/media/1427932-introduction-to-innomen
Also, check out his blog, it has some really interesting stuff in it: http://underlore.com/TBA/
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Playing Poker and Losing More Than Your Money (Safe Sex, and the dangers of not having it)
Now, I don't know who all reads this blog, how old you are, or how naive you can be when it comes to sex. So, fair warning, this one might not be your cup of tea. Although I want everyone to read this, I do not want to offend or insult anyone or their intelligence. Ok, now that your not plotting on finding me in a dark alley, let's move on.
If you have religious reasons (or any other reason for that matter) for not using condoms or birth control, that's fine, it's America and you have the right. But, you should be extra careful, because even though you might not have something, not only do people lie, but a large portion of people that have a sexually transmitted disease, don't even know they do.
There is a staggering amount of teens that are getting pregnant and infected with STDs. Most people over the age of 25 don't even think about this unless they have a kid of their own, or they see an extremely young mother with her baby in Walmart. You occasionally hear about it on tv, and even then, it's either not the actual topic, or its soooo boring you immediately change the channel. The worst way we usually see it is on talk shows, where these people are being humiliated for the entertainment of others.
We barely have a sex education in school, and in a lot of schools we have what they call 'abstinence only'. The fact that anything that has to do with the education of sex has the word 'only' in it, makes me cringe. Sex is still taboo to this day. We've loosened up a lot over the years, but not that damn much. People are scared of their kids having sex (and I understand this well, I have a son) and making a mistake that will follow them for the rest of their life. And as with most things we truly fear, we avoid it at all costs. This, in this instance, is a bad mistake. But, fear is irrational and its not surprising, it's not right, but its not surprising.
The Health Department gives out free condoms, you can walk in, grab an envelope and walk out. You don't have to ask, they are in a little shelf on the wall by the door. There is no age limit, and no one knows your name. I bet I could pick out 10 random teens age 12-17 and at the very least, 5 of them would be getting new information by me telling them this. I say 12-17 not because I think its cool for that age to be having sex, but that is the age of puberty. We can teach young teens about sex without being crude, and without a stage performance (what's up with those anyway, am I right?).
Just teach them, they aren't dumb, you only talk to them that way when you're uncomfortable with something. They instantly pick up on those vibes, and guess what, now sex is an awkward subject for them too! Do you remember your "birds and the bees" talk, or did you even get one? Did you learn from your friends and just kinda wing it? If you were one of the ones who were 'winging' it, I'm sure you understand how awkward and uncomfortable 'sexy' situations can be.
So if you feel ashamed, weird, or uncomfortable when your getting ready to do the deed, do you think you'll talk about condoms when it comes down to 'nakey time'? Probably not, and if you do and there isn't one around, it's very possible you'll be like "fuck it", and do it anyway. This is sad. Not only are we uneducated, but we are ashamed of our sexuality, it has become something dirty. Because we have been scared, and uneducated, we haven't protected ourselves and sex can now be very deadly.
A teen's self esteem is pretty fragile as it is anyway, to shame them for thoughts that are pretty mandatory, seem like torture to me. But if we arm them with knowledge and the tools to be safe, I bet they would surprise us with how responsible they could be. They might have sex, but they won't be bringing home a baby, or something that could kill or maim them.
It's not just teens that don't practice safe sex either. Adults do this all the time. People get in their heads, that they can just have a quick once over look at their partner and visibly see diseases. Like I said earlier, some people that have diseases don't even know they have them, how could you know in 5 seconds in a dim room?
We get older and our self esteem isn't much better, we've had kids and are not sporting that hot bod anymore, or gravity, stress, the sun, and various other abuses our bodies have endured, have made us (putting it nicely) less than camera ready when naked. So we are doing the same thing as the young adults as far as making deadly gambles with our naughty parts.
I think it would be great for the school to teach sex ed, but you know what would be even greater, if we quit being embarrassed by sex, and teach them at home as well. Teens tend to learn more from each other as far as personal things go. If one or two well educated teens hung out with a large group of not so sex educated teens, I think that could go a pretty long way as well. Nobody wants to see a 15yr old girl with a baby, and we don't want to see another 15yr old boy with child support payments to make. Getting a good education while going through puberty is hard enough without a baby, child support, and a part time job. And it's even harder if your going to the hospital for treatments for a debilitating disease.
Sex is always going to be around. Teens are always going to make bad decisions, and very few people end up marrying the person they lost their virginity to. If all it takes to keep my kid safe is to sit down and have a really uncomfortable talk, then toss him some condoms, then I'm totally cool with that. As adults, we should also be using condoms on a regular basis. No matter how old you are, disease is nothing to take lightly, and neither are babies.
If you have religious reasons (or any other reason for that matter) for not using condoms or birth control, that's fine, it's America and you have the right. But, you should be extra careful, because even though you might not have something, not only do people lie, but a large portion of people that have a sexually transmitted disease, don't even know they do.
There is a staggering amount of teens that are getting pregnant and infected with STDs. Most people over the age of 25 don't even think about this unless they have a kid of their own, or they see an extremely young mother with her baby in Walmart. You occasionally hear about it on tv, and even then, it's either not the actual topic, or its soooo boring you immediately change the channel. The worst way we usually see it is on talk shows, where these people are being humiliated for the entertainment of others.
We barely have a sex education in school, and in a lot of schools we have what they call 'abstinence only'. The fact that anything that has to do with the education of sex has the word 'only' in it, makes me cringe. Sex is still taboo to this day. We've loosened up a lot over the years, but not that damn much. People are scared of their kids having sex (and I understand this well, I have a son) and making a mistake that will follow them for the rest of their life. And as with most things we truly fear, we avoid it at all costs. This, in this instance, is a bad mistake. But, fear is irrational and its not surprising, it's not right, but its not surprising.
The Health Department gives out free condoms, you can walk in, grab an envelope and walk out. You don't have to ask, they are in a little shelf on the wall by the door. There is no age limit, and no one knows your name. I bet I could pick out 10 random teens age 12-17 and at the very least, 5 of them would be getting new information by me telling them this. I say 12-17 not because I think its cool for that age to be having sex, but that is the age of puberty. We can teach young teens about sex without being crude, and without a stage performance (what's up with those anyway, am I right?).
Just teach them, they aren't dumb, you only talk to them that way when you're uncomfortable with something. They instantly pick up on those vibes, and guess what, now sex is an awkward subject for them too! Do you remember your "birds and the bees" talk, or did you even get one? Did you learn from your friends and just kinda wing it? If you were one of the ones who were 'winging' it, I'm sure you understand how awkward and uncomfortable 'sexy' situations can be.
So if you feel ashamed, weird, or uncomfortable when your getting ready to do the deed, do you think you'll talk about condoms when it comes down to 'nakey time'? Probably not, and if you do and there isn't one around, it's very possible you'll be like "fuck it", and do it anyway. This is sad. Not only are we uneducated, but we are ashamed of our sexuality, it has become something dirty. Because we have been scared, and uneducated, we haven't protected ourselves and sex can now be very deadly.
A teen's self esteem is pretty fragile as it is anyway, to shame them for thoughts that are pretty mandatory, seem like torture to me. But if we arm them with knowledge and the tools to be safe, I bet they would surprise us with how responsible they could be. They might have sex, but they won't be bringing home a baby, or something that could kill or maim them.
It's not just teens that don't practice safe sex either. Adults do this all the time. People get in their heads, that they can just have a quick once over look at their partner and visibly see diseases. Like I said earlier, some people that have diseases don't even know they have them, how could you know in 5 seconds in a dim room?
We get older and our self esteem isn't much better, we've had kids and are not sporting that hot bod anymore, or gravity, stress, the sun, and various other abuses our bodies have endured, have made us (putting it nicely) less than camera ready when naked. So we are doing the same thing as the young adults as far as making deadly gambles with our naughty parts.
I think it would be great for the school to teach sex ed, but you know what would be even greater, if we quit being embarrassed by sex, and teach them at home as well. Teens tend to learn more from each other as far as personal things go. If one or two well educated teens hung out with a large group of not so sex educated teens, I think that could go a pretty long way as well. Nobody wants to see a 15yr old girl with a baby, and we don't want to see another 15yr old boy with child support payments to make. Getting a good education while going through puberty is hard enough without a baby, child support, and a part time job. And it's even harder if your going to the hospital for treatments for a debilitating disease.
Sex is always going to be around. Teens are always going to make bad decisions, and very few people end up marrying the person they lost their virginity to. If all it takes to keep my kid safe is to sit down and have a really uncomfortable talk, then toss him some condoms, then I'm totally cool with that. As adults, we should also be using condoms on a regular basis. No matter how old you are, disease is nothing to take lightly, and neither are babies.
Monday, April 4, 2011
Seven Star Review (being the critic of your own life)
We all have certain standards. We expect a certain amount of value in the things we get. We call them high and low standards, but those terms are really relative. What might be a 'low' standard to us could be a 'high' standard to someone else, or even just 'good enough' to someone else. We play horseshoes with things we like and want. Some of us, in that respect, even play golf with hand grenades and make our own hole in ones.
As far as standards go, you can't always get what you want. This is especially the case with other people. When we put those standards on inanimate objects like computers, tvs, cell phones, or things like that, we can usually get pretty close, if not all of what we want. The thing is, we have standards for everything. When we make friends, aquaintances, lovers, or even the people we plan to wake up next to the rest of our lives.
This is where things get tricky for us. People are very much different, and very much alike, in very different ways. What we look for in other people, may not even be the thing we should be looking for. We might find exactly what we're looking for, then we change, or they change. We might find hardly anything we're looking for in someone, then after hanging out with them as a friend, evolve into a perfect match. It's very a complicated and fragile process. Not only do we, ourselves, factor in, but things beyond our control can be a factor in how the flow of events and feelings we encounter can enter our lives.
Let's say we all have a metaphorical shape that encompasses our standards. For this exercise, we will say it's a star (you can see where I'm going can't you?), and lets say that our star has seven points to it, and not only is it a shape, but it is a star shaped hole, we also get a peg, but it is not star shaped, as a matter of fact, we don't know what shape it is at all, we can't see it. Now, anything we interact with has a shape as well, and when we come up to it, we can take it's shaped peg and see if it fits our standard (is this sounding dirty all of a sudden to you too?) and what we expect of it. Now, if it's another person, we get their peg, but they also get ours. So they get our unknown shape and see if it fits them, and we get their shape (which we can see but they can't) and see if it fits to our liking.
Now, all we have to go on from this other person is what they tell us about how we fit into their lives. With that knowledge and the knowledge of how well they would fit in our lives we can make an educated guess of not only how, but were they fit in........you still following me? I know, it's a doosie.
So, say for instance, we meet Jane (I guess we're gonna be a dude for this one), and we have jane's peg in our hand. Jane's peg is probably never gonna be a seven point star(that would be too easy wouldn't it?). Jane has a 5 point star. We can actually put the star piece in, and it fits, but there are 2 little pointy holes that are missing. More than likely this is fine, probably better than fine, its pretty damn good. On most things, we agree, and we're different enough to keep things interesting. Jane has to potential to be 'the star' we're looking for in a committed relationship.
Unfortunately, that is not the only factor. As Jane holds your peg, she still has to decide whether or not your a good fit for her. Let's say your a 4 point star for her. That's probably 'good enough', she likes you, thinks your interesting and everything is sun shiny and rainbows. She decides your 'the star' she wants in her life too. Win/win, right?
So you've told jane that she is the best fit for your life, and she's told you the same (certainly neither one of you would tell the other that 'your almost perfect' or 'good enough for now') and you go on your merry way. You have a great time, do fun things, and are pretty much two happy people.
Then, you start realizing what those little holes are. For you its small things, Jane's star is only missing two small pieces, things you can get over 'easy enough'. But, for Jane, those holes suck pretty bad. Its cool though, Jane's a trooper! The good outweighs anything else and that's 'good enough' for her. Well, that is, until it isn't.
Jane get tired of handling whatever it is she doesn't care for. It gets old. She needs something more. Your kinda tired too, but not too bad. After all, its not that big of a problem for you. You might not even notice the signs yet of whats going on.
But if you do, you two can work through it, your star gets an extra peg or two, you fit better because you've grown together, and you work it out.
On the other hand, one or both of you get haggard, pegs are jammed into the shape so tightly that they begin flaking off and eventually, you just don't fit anymore. It's sad, but but you move on.
Standards are relative. We all need different things, we grow as people, learn new things and hopefully find someone who can grow with us. No one is going to get a 7 star review at first. But with time and patience, they can get those 'extra points' they need to be your perfect star. It's when we start pushing triangles into the spot where our 'star' goes that we get into trouble.
They only way for someone to know where they fit in is for you to tell them. It sucks when people leave our lives, or when we leave on our own. But, not only is change necessary, but it can be good for us as well. Just because we don't know what's right around the corner, doesn't mean it's gonna be scary. Being afraid of not being liked, or of change can really hinder our ability to grow and adapt. Yeah, bad things can happen. But, bad things are gonna happen anyway. Good things can and will happen too. Things are mostly what you make of them, make something crazy good if you can.
So get out there, live a little, and be honest about where your people fit in. If you don't, not only are you hurting them, your also hurting yourself.
As far as standards go, you can't always get what you want. This is especially the case with other people. When we put those standards on inanimate objects like computers, tvs, cell phones, or things like that, we can usually get pretty close, if not all of what we want. The thing is, we have standards for everything. When we make friends, aquaintances, lovers, or even the people we plan to wake up next to the rest of our lives.
This is where things get tricky for us. People are very much different, and very much alike, in very different ways. What we look for in other people, may not even be the thing we should be looking for. We might find exactly what we're looking for, then we change, or they change. We might find hardly anything we're looking for in someone, then after hanging out with them as a friend, evolve into a perfect match. It's very a complicated and fragile process. Not only do we, ourselves, factor in, but things beyond our control can be a factor in how the flow of events and feelings we encounter can enter our lives.
Let's say we all have a metaphorical shape that encompasses our standards. For this exercise, we will say it's a star (you can see where I'm going can't you?), and lets say that our star has seven points to it, and not only is it a shape, but it is a star shaped hole, we also get a peg, but it is not star shaped, as a matter of fact, we don't know what shape it is at all, we can't see it. Now, anything we interact with has a shape as well, and when we come up to it, we can take it's shaped peg and see if it fits our standard (is this sounding dirty all of a sudden to you too?) and what we expect of it. Now, if it's another person, we get their peg, but they also get ours. So they get our unknown shape and see if it fits them, and we get their shape (which we can see but they can't) and see if it fits to our liking.
Now, all we have to go on from this other person is what they tell us about how we fit into their lives. With that knowledge and the knowledge of how well they would fit in our lives we can make an educated guess of not only how, but were they fit in........you still following me? I know, it's a doosie.
So, say for instance, we meet Jane (I guess we're gonna be a dude for this one), and we have jane's peg in our hand. Jane's peg is probably never gonna be a seven point star(that would be too easy wouldn't it?). Jane has a 5 point star. We can actually put the star piece in, and it fits, but there are 2 little pointy holes that are missing. More than likely this is fine, probably better than fine, its pretty damn good. On most things, we agree, and we're different enough to keep things interesting. Jane has to potential to be 'the star' we're looking for in a committed relationship.
Unfortunately, that is not the only factor. As Jane holds your peg, she still has to decide whether or not your a good fit for her. Let's say your a 4 point star for her. That's probably 'good enough', she likes you, thinks your interesting and everything is sun shiny and rainbows. She decides your 'the star' she wants in her life too. Win/win, right?
So you've told jane that she is the best fit for your life, and she's told you the same (certainly neither one of you would tell the other that 'your almost perfect' or 'good enough for now') and you go on your merry way. You have a great time, do fun things, and are pretty much two happy people.
Then, you start realizing what those little holes are. For you its small things, Jane's star is only missing two small pieces, things you can get over 'easy enough'. But, for Jane, those holes suck pretty bad. Its cool though, Jane's a trooper! The good outweighs anything else and that's 'good enough' for her. Well, that is, until it isn't.
Jane get tired of handling whatever it is she doesn't care for. It gets old. She needs something more. Your kinda tired too, but not too bad. After all, its not that big of a problem for you. You might not even notice the signs yet of whats going on.
But if you do, you two can work through it, your star gets an extra peg or two, you fit better because you've grown together, and you work it out.
On the other hand, one or both of you get haggard, pegs are jammed into the shape so tightly that they begin flaking off and eventually, you just don't fit anymore. It's sad, but but you move on.
Standards are relative. We all need different things, we grow as people, learn new things and hopefully find someone who can grow with us. No one is going to get a 7 star review at first. But with time and patience, they can get those 'extra points' they need to be your perfect star. It's when we start pushing triangles into the spot where our 'star' goes that we get into trouble.
They only way for someone to know where they fit in is for you to tell them. It sucks when people leave our lives, or when we leave on our own. But, not only is change necessary, but it can be good for us as well. Just because we don't know what's right around the corner, doesn't mean it's gonna be scary. Being afraid of not being liked, or of change can really hinder our ability to grow and adapt. Yeah, bad things can happen. But, bad things are gonna happen anyway. Good things can and will happen too. Things are mostly what you make of them, make something crazy good if you can.
So get out there, live a little, and be honest about where your people fit in. If you don't, not only are you hurting them, your also hurting yourself.
Saturday, April 2, 2011
Dreaming: Now in stereo (where available)
A while back, I read an article or blog that resonated with me so much that, years later, I still kinda quote from it while talking to people. Now, if your like me, most of the stuff you've heard or seen through your (very interesting I'm sure) life has made you what you are today. So like me, when talking about certain things, your brain pukes out little bits of relevant material that either you have done, witnessed, read, watched or any other vehicle that you digest your knowledge. Ok, now that we understand that I'm writing something about something that I've read, then formed some of my own ideas, we can move on to what I'm getting at (credit where credit is due).
The topic was about technology. I love technology, you love technology, and even if we are not crazy advanced in understanding the best of it, we use it every day. The biggest thing that most of us use it for is to keep from being bored. There are awesome ways it's changing our world, I know, but when I think of it outside of medicine and communication, I think games, music, etc.
Ok, so technology has changed our lives, mostly for the better all and all. We can be at home by ourselves, but not be alone. How great is that? I'll tell you. It's fucking wonderful. There's more out there than outrageously social people that can talk to anyone. There are people who stay at home and don't go out, they aren't great with interacting with people, maybe they have a disorder of somekind, or a phobia, whatever, but they're out there, and we don't see them. This is not to say, they are not interesting people, with interesting ideas, they just don't do the face to face thing well, and this is the best thing since sliced bread for them, and quite frankly, all of us too.
Now, how could technology be a bad thing Jessica? Well, boys and girls, I'm not so sure what I'm getting at is bad per say, but I'd like to put it out there anyway. Tell me more. Oh, I will.
Back when I was a teenager, we had the internet, but as far as cell phones go, they weren't really anything more than a phone, and maybe had a few basic games on them. I wasn't that interested in the net yet. I had email, and one (what I called back then, and now realize I'm old) pen pal that I wrote, maybe, once a week. So other than that, I ran the streets with my friends, listened to music on a bulky stereo, or portable cd player (what is that?), did some bad stuff, some good stuff, or sat bored until the next thing came floating by.
And that, boys and girls, is what we have lost. Boredom. Seems like a dirty word doesn't it? We use it in a bad way, cause it sucks to feel that way. But the more I think about it, the more I feel like maybe we did lose something important, and I'll tell you why.
When I was a teenager and was sitting around bored for an hour or two, I would daydream (get the title now?, YYEEEAAAH! slid that right in there). I think about stuff all the time, but I usually daydream when I'm bored, and it's quiet. Now it seems, I don't day dream as much as I used to. Mostly, I do it when I am outside smoking, and before I moved here, I didn't smoke outside, so I day dreamed even less.
When was the last time you had a day dream? What do you day dream about? Is it about something you want to happen? Off the wall things that never could? Are you in your own day dreams, or are they like watching a movie? Are you a famous rock star that everyone is cheering on? Scenarios of what you will say to someone?
It doesn't matter really. Day dreaming is your creative side working its magic. It's more that just thinking, it's ideas with a vision. Even if you day dream about things that are in the past and can not be changed, that same dream can lead to ideas that work for you now. As it turns out, boredom breeds creativity.
Creativity breeds almost everything awesome we know and love. Because of it we have music, movies, games, and technology. It's kind of ironic, me make things to keep us from being bored, but being bored can make us creative, can make us create.
I love tech, I do. I don't know where I'd be without little do dads to keep me company most of my day. But I think that maybe, for an hour or two a day, we should try to find time to day dream a little. I know after snapping out of a vivid day dream, I usually find myself in a better mood. When was the last time you saw someone staring at nothing an smiling that wasn't drooling in a hospital? That person might just be brainstorming the next thing that helps 100s of people. Or comes out with the most rockin lyrics to ever blow your face off.
So, dream a little dream for me.
The topic was about technology. I love technology, you love technology, and even if we are not crazy advanced in understanding the best of it, we use it every day. The biggest thing that most of us use it for is to keep from being bored. There are awesome ways it's changing our world, I know, but when I think of it outside of medicine and communication, I think games, music, etc.
Ok, so technology has changed our lives, mostly for the better all and all. We can be at home by ourselves, but not be alone. How great is that? I'll tell you. It's fucking wonderful. There's more out there than outrageously social people that can talk to anyone. There are people who stay at home and don't go out, they aren't great with interacting with people, maybe they have a disorder of somekind, or a phobia, whatever, but they're out there, and we don't see them. This is not to say, they are not interesting people, with interesting ideas, they just don't do the face to face thing well, and this is the best thing since sliced bread for them, and quite frankly, all of us too.
Now, how could technology be a bad thing Jessica? Well, boys and girls, I'm not so sure what I'm getting at is bad per say, but I'd like to put it out there anyway. Tell me more. Oh, I will.
Back when I was a teenager, we had the internet, but as far as cell phones go, they weren't really anything more than a phone, and maybe had a few basic games on them. I wasn't that interested in the net yet. I had email, and one (what I called back then, and now realize I'm old) pen pal that I wrote, maybe, once a week. So other than that, I ran the streets with my friends, listened to music on a bulky stereo, or portable cd player (what is that?), did some bad stuff, some good stuff, or sat bored until the next thing came floating by.
And that, boys and girls, is what we have lost. Boredom. Seems like a dirty word doesn't it? We use it in a bad way, cause it sucks to feel that way. But the more I think about it, the more I feel like maybe we did lose something important, and I'll tell you why.
When I was a teenager and was sitting around bored for an hour or two, I would daydream (get the title now?, YYEEEAAAH! slid that right in there). I think about stuff all the time, but I usually daydream when I'm bored, and it's quiet. Now it seems, I don't day dream as much as I used to. Mostly, I do it when I am outside smoking, and before I moved here, I didn't smoke outside, so I day dreamed even less.
When was the last time you had a day dream? What do you day dream about? Is it about something you want to happen? Off the wall things that never could? Are you in your own day dreams, or are they like watching a movie? Are you a famous rock star that everyone is cheering on? Scenarios of what you will say to someone?
It doesn't matter really. Day dreaming is your creative side working its magic. It's more that just thinking, it's ideas with a vision. Even if you day dream about things that are in the past and can not be changed, that same dream can lead to ideas that work for you now. As it turns out, boredom breeds creativity.
Creativity breeds almost everything awesome we know and love. Because of it we have music, movies, games, and technology. It's kind of ironic, me make things to keep us from being bored, but being bored can make us creative, can make us create.
I love tech, I do. I don't know where I'd be without little do dads to keep me company most of my day. But I think that maybe, for an hour or two a day, we should try to find time to day dream a little. I know after snapping out of a vivid day dream, I usually find myself in a better mood. When was the last time you saw someone staring at nothing an smiling that wasn't drooling in a hospital? That person might just be brainstorming the next thing that helps 100s of people. Or comes out with the most rockin lyrics to ever blow your face off.
So, dream a little dream for me.
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Living in the OC (pain killer addiction) Part 2
So hopefully you've read my last post before skipping over to this one. This topic is gonna be a long one, but to me its totally worth it. And I promise, I'm not gonna be on this soap box every week. My world wouldn't be so random then, would it? Ok, back to the serious stuff.
So we now know that your brain interprets your painkiller withdrawal as basically starving to death. And that surviving is our number 1 priority. So what else? Well, once we start doing things we consider questionable, like selling all of our stuff, and someone asks 'what the hell dude?', we begin to lie(cue dramatic music here). We are ashamed of what we are doing, and we don't want people we care about to know or try and make us stop. We can't have someone standing in our way now can we? No, sir-ee.
Now we are alone, infants in our addiction, and we need to figure out how to go on. We seek out others like ourselves. These people "understand" us, help us get what we need, they even share their painkillers with us at first, and we do the same. We don't know that most of these friendships are really just the most basic symbiotic relationships. We just need them, and use them, and where we do it with a smile, we lie to ourselves and say "we're the best of friends", or, "he/she knows where i'm coming from." Yeah, that's bologna with a side of flim flam. But, like the rest of them, I did it too.
As our addiction progresses though, we get our own dealers or connections, and even the new "friends" start getting in the way. They run out of their 'medicine' and come 'hang out'. You are now even hiding from them to do your pills. You only want to 'hang out' with them, when your out. But you tell yourself, your not like them, your actually coming to hang out, to get your mind off of things, to come up with a solution together. You want some Jive with that bologna?
So now we are isolated from our real friends, and mostly from our drug friends, and now have nothing. No possessions, no friends, no hope, and possibly no food or utilities or maybe even a place to live. Think we've had enough yet? Nope. Things are terrible! "I need to get a pill so i can just figure all this out", "It's so unfair that so and so won't let me borrow some money, i'm good for it", "I'll remember them when I get back on my feet and they need help". That's not even the worst of it. Despair turns to anger very quickly, and anger can lead you anywhere.
So its very possible that addicts end up stealing, or worse than regular stealing, mugging people and hurting them. This will to survive has turned them into something that they'd never in a million years thought they'd be. A bad person. Deep down inside, they really aren't, but survivors don't care about anything but surviving.
Here's the bad part. People see these "bad people" and say things like, "Just throw them all in Jail", or, "These people are a waste of space". I've even heard and read people saying that it would be great if all the junkies would just die. How great that would be for them, they would just throw a party. This is a terrible way to see another human being. Someone who is really hurting, and needs help. We don't understand them, or know how to help them, so we just want them to die? This is what makes me even more sad than anything. This reaction to our fellow human beings. These are someones brother, sister, mother, father, son, or daughter.
These people didn't sit in class in 3rd grade and answer the word 'junkie' to the question "And what do YOU want to be when you grow up?" Yep, that's the same person that wanted to be an astronaut, doctor, vet, or princess. And where we are now, you can take a look at a 3rd grade class, look in those innocent faces, and know at least 3 will be addicts, and at least 3 probably have an addict for a parent.
So, after all that, What is the solution? Good question. I don't know. Big let down, I know. But I'll tell you this. Treatment can't hurt. Methadone has worse withdrawal than painkillers, and I for one, don't think its an answer, but it gets people off the streets, and possibly has saved the lives of the person on it, or the person they would have attacked for money.
I personally lean more toward suboxone with weekly treatments in group and individual therapy. But, I'm biased. That's what got me off of drugs. That's what also got a few of my friends off of drugs once I was so grateful for getting my life back that I just had to pay it forward. So because i'm biased, I'm gonna tell you what i think about suboxone and therapy.
With methadone, you start on a low dose and work your way up (sound familiar?). With suboxone, you start on the highest dose and work your way down. Suboxone's drug name is buprenorphine and naloxone. That's because it is two drugs in one. It comes as a tablet or film that you place under the tounge which is refered to as sublingual (sounds like underground jive talk i know) medicine.
Suboxone works by introducing an opiate (painkiller) and an opiate blocker into your system. When you first start taking it, you feel the opiate. This gives your brain the thing its looking for, so it quits sending out pain signals to your body (its way of punishing you for not getting those pills it wants) and relaxes. After taking suboxone for a bit, the naloxone starts blocking these opiates. Your brain still senses them there, the naloxone has been present the whole time, but it builds up and overpowers the opiates. So now, your not experiencing your physical withdrawals (which some think are the worst part.)
Well Jessica, if Suboxone works that good, why do you still need the therapy? Because, to get to the point of needing help with addiction, you've been on the drug for quite sometime now. You've learned certain behaviors and conduct yourself in ways you don't even realize now. You no longer cope with stress because you can take something for it. You don't have friends anymore, because the real ones can't handle what you've turned into, and the others use drugs, which you can't be around.
Therapy give you the tools needed to deal with the stresses of everyday life, being an addict, coping with what you've done while you were scouting out drugs. They help you deal with the depression and guilt you will feel for doing the things you've done. And sometimes even find a root cause of why you ended up the way you did (that is, if you didn't get a prescription, some people start them socially).
It also gives you a chance to see and speak with other recovering addicts. Some didn't end up as bad as you, and some ended up in a lot worse shape then you ever did. You start to realize that it could have gotten A LOT worse. These people and counselors have valuable things to tell you. Just as you had to learn how to get your pills and get by, you have to learn how to be sober.
One misconception is that being sober is the same as going back to the way it was. WRONG!!! There is no back to the way it was, you are now either a sober addict, or an unsober addict. Sobriety takes work, and it gets easier, so much that you might hardly ever think of it. But the one day you could be channel surfing and see a milli second of intervention, or a second of a movie where someone is using or going through withdrawals, and you know that seeing that scene makes you feel different and stirs up different emotions than some of the others around you. You understand it, you relate to it, and its who you are now.
So without therapy, suboxone (or any other thing i believe) doesn't really work. You have to be willing to put in the work. You've already found yourself in a world of hurt over believing in magic pills. Even if you could do this without help, why should you. When your car breaks, do you say, "I should be able to do this by myself. Lets just take some of this stuff out and have a look."? No. Do you do your own plumbing when your pipes burst? No. (well, except for the mechanics and plumbers out there, in which case when your Tv breaks, do you take it apart and fix it?...don't be a smarty pants!) This is really no different than that. It is a service offered to people who do not specialize in recovery, cause if we did, we'd be better by now.
There is a light at the end of the tunnel. And you are not a "worthless junkie". You are a human being, and people you don't even know, haven't even met, care about you. And when your ready, they'll be there. But the thing is, you have to want it, not your family, not your friends, you. And you have to do it for yourself, don't make up a reason to do it, cause if that reason goes away, what's to stop you now. Do it for you, and when your the best you can be, then you can make everything else around you better.
For information about suboxone and treatment you can call these numbers. These are professionals and can help you get the recovery you need. You don't have to be alone.
Hand of hope (606) 393-5926 (These people can help you get a doctor, and they do counseling sessions 5 days a week. They are located in the sky tower)
Counselors clinical cottage (606) 329-0727 (basically the same as above)
If you know of anywhere else, feel free to add the details in the comments section below. You never know, you might save a life with one comment.
So we now know that your brain interprets your painkiller withdrawal as basically starving to death. And that surviving is our number 1 priority. So what else? Well, once we start doing things we consider questionable, like selling all of our stuff, and someone asks 'what the hell dude?', we begin to lie(cue dramatic music here). We are ashamed of what we are doing, and we don't want people we care about to know or try and make us stop. We can't have someone standing in our way now can we? No, sir-ee.
Now we are alone, infants in our addiction, and we need to figure out how to go on. We seek out others like ourselves. These people "understand" us, help us get what we need, they even share their painkillers with us at first, and we do the same. We don't know that most of these friendships are really just the most basic symbiotic relationships. We just need them, and use them, and where we do it with a smile, we lie to ourselves and say "we're the best of friends", or, "he/she knows where i'm coming from." Yeah, that's bologna with a side of flim flam. But, like the rest of them, I did it too.
As our addiction progresses though, we get our own dealers or connections, and even the new "friends" start getting in the way. They run out of their 'medicine' and come 'hang out'. You are now even hiding from them to do your pills. You only want to 'hang out' with them, when your out. But you tell yourself, your not like them, your actually coming to hang out, to get your mind off of things, to come up with a solution together. You want some Jive with that bologna?
So now we are isolated from our real friends, and mostly from our drug friends, and now have nothing. No possessions, no friends, no hope, and possibly no food or utilities or maybe even a place to live. Think we've had enough yet? Nope. Things are terrible! "I need to get a pill so i can just figure all this out", "It's so unfair that so and so won't let me borrow some money, i'm good for it", "I'll remember them when I get back on my feet and they need help". That's not even the worst of it. Despair turns to anger very quickly, and anger can lead you anywhere.
So its very possible that addicts end up stealing, or worse than regular stealing, mugging people and hurting them. This will to survive has turned them into something that they'd never in a million years thought they'd be. A bad person. Deep down inside, they really aren't, but survivors don't care about anything but surviving.
Here's the bad part. People see these "bad people" and say things like, "Just throw them all in Jail", or, "These people are a waste of space". I've even heard and read people saying that it would be great if all the junkies would just die. How great that would be for them, they would just throw a party. This is a terrible way to see another human being. Someone who is really hurting, and needs help. We don't understand them, or know how to help them, so we just want them to die? This is what makes me even more sad than anything. This reaction to our fellow human beings. These are someones brother, sister, mother, father, son, or daughter.
These people didn't sit in class in 3rd grade and answer the word 'junkie' to the question "And what do YOU want to be when you grow up?" Yep, that's the same person that wanted to be an astronaut, doctor, vet, or princess. And where we are now, you can take a look at a 3rd grade class, look in those innocent faces, and know at least 3 will be addicts, and at least 3 probably have an addict for a parent.
So, after all that, What is the solution? Good question. I don't know. Big let down, I know. But I'll tell you this. Treatment can't hurt. Methadone has worse withdrawal than painkillers, and I for one, don't think its an answer, but it gets people off the streets, and possibly has saved the lives of the person on it, or the person they would have attacked for money.
I personally lean more toward suboxone with weekly treatments in group and individual therapy. But, I'm biased. That's what got me off of drugs. That's what also got a few of my friends off of drugs once I was so grateful for getting my life back that I just had to pay it forward. So because i'm biased, I'm gonna tell you what i think about suboxone and therapy.
With methadone, you start on a low dose and work your way up (sound familiar?). With suboxone, you start on the highest dose and work your way down. Suboxone's drug name is buprenorphine and naloxone. That's because it is two drugs in one. It comes as a tablet or film that you place under the tounge which is refered to as sublingual (sounds like underground jive talk i know) medicine.
Suboxone works by introducing an opiate (painkiller) and an opiate blocker into your system. When you first start taking it, you feel the opiate. This gives your brain the thing its looking for, so it quits sending out pain signals to your body (its way of punishing you for not getting those pills it wants) and relaxes. After taking suboxone for a bit, the naloxone starts blocking these opiates. Your brain still senses them there, the naloxone has been present the whole time, but it builds up and overpowers the opiates. So now, your not experiencing your physical withdrawals (which some think are the worst part.)
Well Jessica, if Suboxone works that good, why do you still need the therapy? Because, to get to the point of needing help with addiction, you've been on the drug for quite sometime now. You've learned certain behaviors and conduct yourself in ways you don't even realize now. You no longer cope with stress because you can take something for it. You don't have friends anymore, because the real ones can't handle what you've turned into, and the others use drugs, which you can't be around.
Therapy give you the tools needed to deal with the stresses of everyday life, being an addict, coping with what you've done while you were scouting out drugs. They help you deal with the depression and guilt you will feel for doing the things you've done. And sometimes even find a root cause of why you ended up the way you did (that is, if you didn't get a prescription, some people start them socially).
It also gives you a chance to see and speak with other recovering addicts. Some didn't end up as bad as you, and some ended up in a lot worse shape then you ever did. You start to realize that it could have gotten A LOT worse. These people and counselors have valuable things to tell you. Just as you had to learn how to get your pills and get by, you have to learn how to be sober.
One misconception is that being sober is the same as going back to the way it was. WRONG!!! There is no back to the way it was, you are now either a sober addict, or an unsober addict. Sobriety takes work, and it gets easier, so much that you might hardly ever think of it. But the one day you could be channel surfing and see a milli second of intervention, or a second of a movie where someone is using or going through withdrawals, and you know that seeing that scene makes you feel different and stirs up different emotions than some of the others around you. You understand it, you relate to it, and its who you are now.
So without therapy, suboxone (or any other thing i believe) doesn't really work. You have to be willing to put in the work. You've already found yourself in a world of hurt over believing in magic pills. Even if you could do this without help, why should you. When your car breaks, do you say, "I should be able to do this by myself. Lets just take some of this stuff out and have a look."? No. Do you do your own plumbing when your pipes burst? No. (well, except for the mechanics and plumbers out there, in which case when your Tv breaks, do you take it apart and fix it?...don't be a smarty pants!) This is really no different than that. It is a service offered to people who do not specialize in recovery, cause if we did, we'd be better by now.
There is a light at the end of the tunnel. And you are not a "worthless junkie". You are a human being, and people you don't even know, haven't even met, care about you. And when your ready, they'll be there. But the thing is, you have to want it, not your family, not your friends, you. And you have to do it for yourself, don't make up a reason to do it, cause if that reason goes away, what's to stop you now. Do it for you, and when your the best you can be, then you can make everything else around you better.
For information about suboxone and treatment you can call these numbers. These are professionals and can help you get the recovery you need. You don't have to be alone.
Hand of hope (606) 393-5926 (These people can help you get a doctor, and they do counseling sessions 5 days a week. They are located in the sky tower)
Counselors clinical cottage (606) 329-0727 (basically the same as above)
If you know of anywhere else, feel free to add the details in the comments section below. You never know, you might save a life with one comment.
Living in the OC (pain killer addiction) Part 1
As it turns out here lately, the random world of Jessica has not been so random lately. I have mostly posted things that can help people. I have used my powers for good. Well, today is no different. I still have more to say that could (hopefully) help people. This blog is a 2 parter because it is going to be a long one, but if one person could benefit from it, or even learn something, I don't care how windy I get.
Last night, an old friend from middle school had caught up with me on facebook (yeah, you know who you are *wink*) and we were telling each other a few things to give the other one a kind of idea where we were in our lives right now. Both of us have a child, and are not doing too bad all in all. Then I said "It's refreshing to hear from someone that far back and find out they're not an addict."
This is were you can place the sound of the record scratching and then awkward silence. A minute or two later she wrote, "Actually, I am an addict. I've been clean for 3yrs now..lol". Yikes! I had made a real faux pas (although, now I understand also why we use lol when we are not laughing, she was letting me know it was cool, she wasn't angry, which is good.) and what I said had come out wrong.
The thing is, I'm also an addict (shocked? You shouldn't be if you know me) with 3yrs sobriety. What a coincidence, that we went to the same school, both got hooked on pills, and both had 3yrs clean. But....the only real coincidence was the we both were clean.
In this area, we have what we like to call an epidemic. In 2008 a study found that of people 12 and over, 6 and a half percent had used pain killers without a prescription(same percentage as Oregon, it's a tie, as the second worse pill problem in the US). Yeah, and I have an igloo in Antarctica for sale. Take that number, and at the very least, multiply it by 2 and a half, and thats with anywhere you go with a statistic on drug use.
Back to my story (then we'll go on). So, after typing that stupid sentence I put out in the air, I tell her that I am also an addict who has three years clean. Which, if I was her, I would have called BS, cause first I've insulted you, and now, I'm just like you. Yeah, I totally would have called me out on lying, but she must have known somehow i was telling the truth, or she was just being polite until the crazy person on the other side shut up for a sec, so she could log off (either way, she was very graceful about it).
Jane told me (we will call her jane so this doesn't get too hard to follow) that she had been in a car accident, and had been ejected from the vehicle and barely made it out with her life. She went through physical therapy, and had many obstacles she overcame along the way. After getting well, she was no longer prescribed the pain medicine she had been taking for quite some time now. She felt horrible, I'm sure (without her telling me) in her mind at the time she probably thought she had some kind of permanent nerve damage. She was probably fine when she took a pill, and she had completed all her therapy, obviously the doctor missed something, Jane needed "pain management".
And there it is. Those two words, pain management, have been the first two words in the beginning of, what turned out to be the hardest struggle in some peoples lives, or worse the damnation and death of others.
Hey Jessica, if pills are so bad, why take them? Well, boys n girls (haha), as it turns out, pills have been the one drug to turn people who would have, in normal circumstances, not ended up on drugs. Bad things happen, and when people get hurt, doctors prescribe pain medicine.
If you know you have a problem then why don't you just stop? That is a good question, and a very uneducated question at the same time. Its hard to understand why people keep throwing their lives, children, money, and possessions away once they realize they have a problem. Most people have never felt a serious withdrawal. At the most, we can relate this feeling to not having coffee for a few days, or to our nicotine dependency if we have one. The easiest way for me to put it is: What ever you are taking that is addictive, what ever it treats, when you stop taking that, that is what it gives you back times 10.
So, if your taking an anti-depressant and stop, your going to be unbelievably depressed. If your taking ADHD medicine and stop, your not going to be able to focus on anything. So imagine this. Your taking a mild to medium painkiller, when you feel pain from the withdrawal from that, you will hurt pretty darn bad. So what will you do, find more, that's what. You know what else? If you can't find a small dose after a while, you'll just take a somewhat bigger dose. Well, well, well, guess what now, you feel HORRIBLE. So eventually, you'll take oxy, and you know who gets oxy? Cancer patients, major surgery patients, and people who are dying. Because if you're dying, you have no time to have to deal with withdrawal. So, if you take a medicine that is primarily given to people dying, or with mind blowing pain, what do you get when you stop taking that? Answer: A real problem.
Imagine being so sick you can't even do daily tasks like taking a shower without unspeakable pain. Now imagine that there is a pill out there, and for 30 dollars, you could feel great and get things done, and not be miserable. Would you buy that pill? Now imagine that you did, and the next day you felt bad again (because the pill is not a cure, but only a treatment), so bad you couldn't cook yourself a meal and minutes felt like hours. You have 30 dollars, but you need things for your house. Which one would you buy? It's easy to say things for your house if your not really feeling what I just described.
It doesn't just stop there though, you would run out of money. Next idea you would have is to sell the things you "don't need". Then to sacrifice the things you do. Then guess what? Surprise! That pill doesn't last all day anymore, it lasts about 8hrs, then later down the road, 4hrs. Now what?
We are wired to survive, and pills actually rewire your brain to need them as much as you need food and water. Your brain believes you are dying without these. And we will do what needs to be done to survive. The thing is, the survivor in us, they aren't graceful, they aren't pretty, and they aren't nice. Those are luxuries that we now "don't need."
This is the end of Part 1. Stay tuned for part 2. Same bat time same bat channel. (maybe in an hour, or in a few days. Depends on what chores I gotta do around the house)
Last night, an old friend from middle school had caught up with me on facebook (yeah, you know who you are *wink*) and we were telling each other a few things to give the other one a kind of idea where we were in our lives right now. Both of us have a child, and are not doing too bad all in all. Then I said "It's refreshing to hear from someone that far back and find out they're not an addict."
This is were you can place the sound of the record scratching and then awkward silence. A minute or two later she wrote, "Actually, I am an addict. I've been clean for 3yrs now..lol". Yikes! I had made a real faux pas (although, now I understand also why we use lol when we are not laughing, she was letting me know it was cool, she wasn't angry, which is good.) and what I said had come out wrong.
The thing is, I'm also an addict (shocked? You shouldn't be if you know me) with 3yrs sobriety. What a coincidence, that we went to the same school, both got hooked on pills, and both had 3yrs clean. But....the only real coincidence was the we both were clean.
In this area, we have what we like to call an epidemic. In 2008 a study found that of people 12 and over, 6 and a half percent had used pain killers without a prescription(same percentage as Oregon, it's a tie, as the second worse pill problem in the US). Yeah, and I have an igloo in Antarctica for sale. Take that number, and at the very least, multiply it by 2 and a half, and thats with anywhere you go with a statistic on drug use.
Back to my story (then we'll go on). So, after typing that stupid sentence I put out in the air, I tell her that I am also an addict who has three years clean. Which, if I was her, I would have called BS, cause first I've insulted you, and now, I'm just like you. Yeah, I totally would have called me out on lying, but she must have known somehow i was telling the truth, or she was just being polite until the crazy person on the other side shut up for a sec, so she could log off (either way, she was very graceful about it).
Jane told me (we will call her jane so this doesn't get too hard to follow) that she had been in a car accident, and had been ejected from the vehicle and barely made it out with her life. She went through physical therapy, and had many obstacles she overcame along the way. After getting well, she was no longer prescribed the pain medicine she had been taking for quite some time now. She felt horrible, I'm sure (without her telling me) in her mind at the time she probably thought she had some kind of permanent nerve damage. She was probably fine when she took a pill, and she had completed all her therapy, obviously the doctor missed something, Jane needed "pain management".
And there it is. Those two words, pain management, have been the first two words in the beginning of, what turned out to be the hardest struggle in some peoples lives, or worse the damnation and death of others.
Hey Jessica, if pills are so bad, why take them? Well, boys n girls (haha), as it turns out, pills have been the one drug to turn people who would have, in normal circumstances, not ended up on drugs. Bad things happen, and when people get hurt, doctors prescribe pain medicine.
If you know you have a problem then why don't you just stop? That is a good question, and a very uneducated question at the same time. Its hard to understand why people keep throwing their lives, children, money, and possessions away once they realize they have a problem. Most people have never felt a serious withdrawal. At the most, we can relate this feeling to not having coffee for a few days, or to our nicotine dependency if we have one. The easiest way for me to put it is: What ever you are taking that is addictive, what ever it treats, when you stop taking that, that is what it gives you back times 10.
So, if your taking an anti-depressant and stop, your going to be unbelievably depressed. If your taking ADHD medicine and stop, your not going to be able to focus on anything. So imagine this. Your taking a mild to medium painkiller, when you feel pain from the withdrawal from that, you will hurt pretty darn bad. So what will you do, find more, that's what. You know what else? If you can't find a small dose after a while, you'll just take a somewhat bigger dose. Well, well, well, guess what now, you feel HORRIBLE. So eventually, you'll take oxy, and you know who gets oxy? Cancer patients, major surgery patients, and people who are dying. Because if you're dying, you have no time to have to deal with withdrawal. So, if you take a medicine that is primarily given to people dying, or with mind blowing pain, what do you get when you stop taking that? Answer: A real problem.
Imagine being so sick you can't even do daily tasks like taking a shower without unspeakable pain. Now imagine that there is a pill out there, and for 30 dollars, you could feel great and get things done, and not be miserable. Would you buy that pill? Now imagine that you did, and the next day you felt bad again (because the pill is not a cure, but only a treatment), so bad you couldn't cook yourself a meal and minutes felt like hours. You have 30 dollars, but you need things for your house. Which one would you buy? It's easy to say things for your house if your not really feeling what I just described.
It doesn't just stop there though, you would run out of money. Next idea you would have is to sell the things you "don't need". Then to sacrifice the things you do. Then guess what? Surprise! That pill doesn't last all day anymore, it lasts about 8hrs, then later down the road, 4hrs. Now what?
We are wired to survive, and pills actually rewire your brain to need them as much as you need food and water. Your brain believes you are dying without these. And we will do what needs to be done to survive. The thing is, the survivor in us, they aren't graceful, they aren't pretty, and they aren't nice. Those are luxuries that we now "don't need."
This is the end of Part 1. Stay tuned for part 2. Same bat time same bat channel. (maybe in an hour, or in a few days. Depends on what chores I gotta do around the house)
Monday, March 28, 2011
Combined Resources (How the system can help you)
After my last post (still patting myself on the back, and boy are my arms tired!) I had someone ask me if I had a car, which I don't, because they wanted a ride to the doctor. They had a Bike, but didn't want to have to pedal in the cold snap we're having, and I don't blame them, burrrr. Anyway, I suggested the city bus. It's cheap, helps the environment, and comes in quiet handy when you have to carry things that wouldn't be practical on a bike, or too tiring on foot.
My friend was like 'That's a great idea' and suggested that i make a post on the community resources in our area so that people could get the things they need, that they might otherwise not know were in place, or have forgotten about. Well...I agree. Even though blogs are open for anyone in the world to read, this one is brand new, and lets face it, only people from Ashland, Ky are reading this now, or anytime in the near future for that matter.
So, I'm gonna try to not be too windy, but I want to list some of the resources in the Ashland area that are available to people with low to no income. Some people think if they have a job that they make too much, but some of these have a higher bar than you might think. As a matter of fact, even if you don't qualify for food stamps, you probably will qualify for most of these assistance programs. And on that note, here we go:
1. Cabinet of Family Resources - 920-2013 (this is where you get SNAP benifits, which is foodstamps, Medicaid, Ktap, and there are other resources there from time to time, they also post seasonal assistance on a cork board to help people find other area assistance.)
2. Social Security Office - 324-0516 (Just the mention of this place can give you a headache, but here you can get a replacement social security card, fill out for SSI or social security retirement. It isn't the easiest thing to get by any means, but if you believe you qualify and you don't try, then you'll never know.)
3. Cares - 324-2949 (This one goes unnoticed a lot. Think of Cares as a hub. The churches in the area that like to help others give money here so that their dollar stretches further. Cares helps with past due utility bills, they have a food pantry, emergency food, and they also give you a slip to go to a near by church to get other types of food that they don't have. This resource could be the difference between going hungry for a week, and being able to keep your family/yourself safe and nourished)
4. River City Harvest - 324-3663 (This place is in the same building as the Cares office, so you can do both at the same time. Farmers from our area, donate fresh produce here and it is available as soon as they do. Usually you will see what they have donated laying out on a table in front of the cares office, free to take. Please do not take more than you need, this helps a lot of children get fresh food they would not ordinarily have.)
5. People helping People - 928-4646 (When you go to Cares for utility assistance, they pledge money to your account. The money does not go in, until the rest of the balance is paid, example: you owe 120.00 and they pledge say 50.00, that money does not go into effect until you pay the other 70.00. People helping people will also pledge money to your account to help out. It might not pay it all, but it really softens the blow.)
6. Salvation Army - 324-5751 , 329-0458 (When people think of this place, they think of the thrift store they have, almost like a year round yard sale. This is only one aspect of this place. When you go into the main office, they can help you with their: food pantry they have on site. They also give vouchers sometimes to local grocery stores, and they give vouchers to their own thrift shop, so if you need clothing or dishes, you can get them free of charge. When my house burned down, they help my family so much. I always donate here)
7. Hillcrest/Bruce mission - 324-5723 (This mission is not only for hillcrest and bruce. That is a big misconception. This place helps out a good portion of the ashland area as well. They donate clothing, can goods, household supplies, and have a low cost dentist come in for people without insurance for cleanings and simple extractions. They also get donations of panera bread on Wednesdays that they give out every week.)
8. Shelter of Hope - 324-6700 (not only a great resource for battered women and their children, this place also will give you dishes like coffee cups and plates. When you get a new place and have no money, these few simple things can seem like an impossible task to get. Not anymore! shelter of hope will give them to you free. They also take donations of toys and furniture if your getting rid of yours. They give them to the battered spouses that live there so they will be comfortable. I donate here frequently as well.)
9. Ashland City Bus - 327-2025 (no big explanation here, we know what the bus is, right? Other than that, it costs 0.75 cents to ride, and can be discounted if you receive disability. They sell passes with a certain number of rides on the card, so you can buy one when you have money, and then need a ride when you don't. you can call them for the times they drive past a bus stop near you. Also you can call and let them know where you'll be when a bus does come through so you don't have to walk to the bus stop if its a little far. Well, i said no big explanation, but turns out I'm a liar.)
Those are the best resources I know for the Ashland area that cover a broad range of people. I could go into other ones that just encompass a few types of people, but then the list would be crazy long, and I don't even know if they read this or not. If you have any questions, or would like to know if there is another that might be more suited to your situation or the situation of a friend, feel free to comment, and I will do my best to find out for you.
These resources are here for you to use them. If you qualify, chances are, you actually need them and have just been toughing it out, or hopefully have a close friend or family member helping you. If you need help, you should go and ask for it, especially if you have others that rely on you for their next meal.
On a side note: A lot of these places are church based. No matter what religion you are, or are not, they will not turn you away. They don't even ask if you do subscribe to any religion. Don't let this stop you from getting the help you need.
My friend was like 'That's a great idea' and suggested that i make a post on the community resources in our area so that people could get the things they need, that they might otherwise not know were in place, or have forgotten about. Well...I agree. Even though blogs are open for anyone in the world to read, this one is brand new, and lets face it, only people from Ashland, Ky are reading this now, or anytime in the near future for that matter.
So, I'm gonna try to not be too windy, but I want to list some of the resources in the Ashland area that are available to people with low to no income. Some people think if they have a job that they make too much, but some of these have a higher bar than you might think. As a matter of fact, even if you don't qualify for food stamps, you probably will qualify for most of these assistance programs. And on that note, here we go:
1. Cabinet of Family Resources - 920-2013 (this is where you get SNAP benifits, which is foodstamps, Medicaid, Ktap, and there are other resources there from time to time, they also post seasonal assistance on a cork board to help people find other area assistance.)
2. Social Security Office - 324-0516 (Just the mention of this place can give you a headache, but here you can get a replacement social security card, fill out for SSI or social security retirement. It isn't the easiest thing to get by any means, but if you believe you qualify and you don't try, then you'll never know.)
3. Cares - 324-2949 (This one goes unnoticed a lot. Think of Cares as a hub. The churches in the area that like to help others give money here so that their dollar stretches further. Cares helps with past due utility bills, they have a food pantry, emergency food, and they also give you a slip to go to a near by church to get other types of food that they don't have. This resource could be the difference between going hungry for a week, and being able to keep your family/yourself safe and nourished)
4. River City Harvest - 324-3663 (This place is in the same building as the Cares office, so you can do both at the same time. Farmers from our area, donate fresh produce here and it is available as soon as they do. Usually you will see what they have donated laying out on a table in front of the cares office, free to take. Please do not take more than you need, this helps a lot of children get fresh food they would not ordinarily have.)
5. People helping People - 928-4646 (When you go to Cares for utility assistance, they pledge money to your account. The money does not go in, until the rest of the balance is paid, example: you owe 120.00 and they pledge say 50.00, that money does not go into effect until you pay the other 70.00. People helping people will also pledge money to your account to help out. It might not pay it all, but it really softens the blow.)
6. Salvation Army - 324-5751 , 329-0458 (When people think of this place, they think of the thrift store they have, almost like a year round yard sale. This is only one aspect of this place. When you go into the main office, they can help you with their: food pantry they have on site. They also give vouchers sometimes to local grocery stores, and they give vouchers to their own thrift shop, so if you need clothing or dishes, you can get them free of charge. When my house burned down, they help my family so much. I always donate here)
7. Hillcrest/Bruce mission - 324-5723 (This mission is not only for hillcrest and bruce. That is a big misconception. This place helps out a good portion of the ashland area as well. They donate clothing, can goods, household supplies, and have a low cost dentist come in for people without insurance for cleanings and simple extractions. They also get donations of panera bread on Wednesdays that they give out every week.)
8. Shelter of Hope - 324-6700 (not only a great resource for battered women and their children, this place also will give you dishes like coffee cups and plates. When you get a new place and have no money, these few simple things can seem like an impossible task to get. Not anymore! shelter of hope will give them to you free. They also take donations of toys and furniture if your getting rid of yours. They give them to the battered spouses that live there so they will be comfortable. I donate here frequently as well.)
9. Ashland City Bus - 327-2025 (no big explanation here, we know what the bus is, right? Other than that, it costs 0.75 cents to ride, and can be discounted if you receive disability. They sell passes with a certain number of rides on the card, so you can buy one when you have money, and then need a ride when you don't. you can call them for the times they drive past a bus stop near you. Also you can call and let them know where you'll be when a bus does come through so you don't have to walk to the bus stop if its a little far. Well, i said no big explanation, but turns out I'm a liar.)
Those are the best resources I know for the Ashland area that cover a broad range of people. I could go into other ones that just encompass a few types of people, but then the list would be crazy long, and I don't even know if they read this or not. If you have any questions, or would like to know if there is another that might be more suited to your situation or the situation of a friend, feel free to comment, and I will do my best to find out for you.
These resources are here for you to use them. If you qualify, chances are, you actually need them and have just been toughing it out, or hopefully have a close friend or family member helping you. If you need help, you should go and ask for it, especially if you have others that rely on you for their next meal.
On a side note: A lot of these places are church based. No matter what religion you are, or are not, they will not turn you away. They don't even ask if you do subscribe to any religion. Don't let this stop you from getting the help you need.
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